psl: polychromatic AU | stargazers

[sleepingstar]

[On the top of the hill, Pai feels like she can reach up and touch the stars. Lying on her back, the grass scratchy on the back of her neck, she stares up at the sky.

She reaches an arm up and covers one of the stars with her thumb. Look, brother! I made another star fall! Except it's still there; all she has to do is move her hand. She doesn't have to kill anyone anymore. Neither of them do.

Hei isn't comfortable here. He's fallen into the habit of paranoia. He doesn't trust the peace, doesn't remember who he is outside of the Syndicate's control. He's so very human in that respect. Pai isn't bothered by the uncertainty. It's irrational to worry about something so completely out of her control.

Instead of making the stars fall, she can make them into stories. She traces shapes in the sky -- finding a bear, a swan, a man dancing. It's a silly exercise, but important. The mind is a muscle like any other; it requires a variety of exercises. It needs whimsey & rationality, exertion & rest.]

熊...

Comments

[sleepingstar]

They sound like Contractors.

[candothat]

[He bites back the knee-jerk reaction to deny any similarities between Vulcans and Contractors.] They do, and they are stronger and faster than humans, but they don't kill. [That sounds snippier than intended. With an apologetic tone, Pavel adds:] I mean to say that pacifism is also a significant part of their philosophy, from what I know.

They appreciate science, and they are exceptionally intelligent by human standards. I like the Vulcans [Wulcans] I have met. Whether or not they would say the same of me... [He smiles and shrugs.] However, I find that their humor leaves much to be desired.

[mortemscintilla]

[ Likewise, Hei refrains from snapping that all Contractors don't kill by choice. But they possess abilities that can be extremely destructive in the right -- or wrong -- hands. Most governments are quick to view them solely as lethally efficient weapons. They stop at nothing to pressure Contractors into service: threats, brainwashing, blackmail. Other Contractors join out of a lack of options. In a society where they're treated as monsters, espionage and wetwork offers them a sort of niche, at least. A sense of purpose. A way to survive. ]

[ But the bottom line is a lack of alternatives. Certainly, Pai didn't have any. Nor did Hei, except at the very end. ]

I'm sure the Wul -- Vulcans [ Pavel's pronunciation is contagious ] have some semblance of humor, though. A lack of it would suggest a lack of personality. [ And even Contractors have that. In some cases, too much. ]

[sleepingstar]

[For her part, Pai is confused. Pacifism is an ideology, and hardly a logical one. It spells death in the face of an attack.

Also, why did Hei change his pronunciation? She peers at her brother curiously.]

[candothat]

[On the upside, pacifistic cultures are seldom targeted by the more violent and gun-happy civilizations. The Klingons, for example, see no sport in terrorizing a people who will not retaliate.

Hei's verbal slip-up goes wholly unnoticed.]

Of course they have a sense of humor. [Sort of. No, they do, it's just... not very robust.] They wouldn't admit to it, maybe. Humor isn't logical.

[mortemscintilla]

[ In Hei's opinion, that's not an upside. Not unless the violent civilizations believe in playing fair -- or in engaging only with 'worthy adversaries.' Ultimately it still leaves you vulnerable to attack, especially by more ruthless opponents. From what's he's experienced, pacifism is very much a luxury paid-for by warriors. ]

[ He feels Pai's curious eyes on him, and manages a barely-there smile. Sometimes his chameleon nature acts up without being prompted -- emulating the verbal tics and mannerisms of those around him in an effort to blend in. Unfortunately Pavel's accent would suit Hei as much as socks on a rooster. ]

There's a certain logic to humor, [ he argues. ] Definitions of 'humorous' vary from person to person. But overall it's linked with resilience under stress. It's a coping mechanism for when you're not in control of your environment. Emotional regulation, even. [ Amber's words, on his tongue. As always they leave a faintly bittersweet aftertaste. ]

[sleepingstar]

He says that like he has one. [A joke, of course. Hei has a sense of humor -- low key, often morbid, but still there. He learned it from Amber; they both had. The lessons came more naturally to Hei, being human, but Pai had worked harder at it. Any measure of happiness she could bring him in the midst of Hell was worth the effort to her.]

[candothat]

I think Vulcans, ideally, are emotionally well-regulated. [When they aren't being provoked after having their planet destroyed.] Nyota would know about this than I do.

[Pai's comment provokes a smile.] And you, Pai? How is your sense of humor?

[mortemscintilla]

Are there a lot of Vulcans in Nyota's life?

[ At Pai's remark -- and Pavel's question -- his gaze flicks down, fingers tugging teasingly at the end of Pai's wispy ponytail. ] Too much mouth, [ Although he seems inordinately indulgent. Truth be told, he's always secretly pleased with Pai, even when she's mouthing off. (He's had no idea how much he's missed even this, the intimacy of little barbs -- something small and familial and almost human. In the outsized steel and glass environs of Tokyo, and later, the City, it's easy to feel like just an anonymous face in the crowd, an unknowable blur. Which is a feeling Hei has grown accustomed to -- even welcomed out of operational necessity.) ]

[ Odd how something as simple as this can swamp him with a stunning nostalgia, although Pai's right here. ]

[sleepingstar]

[She makes a face at Hei, but she's happy. Nudging him with her shoulder, she turns to Chekov.]

Who's Nyota?

[candothat]

Perhaps, but I only know that she spends time with Commander Spock, who is half-Vulcan. [Rumor has it that the two are dating, actually, and Nyota does seem to miss him; that, however, is none of Pavel's business. It's fine to pry into the lives of peers, but superiors? No.

He also shouldn't ask too much about the relationship between Hei and Pai. Their wordless interactions are sweet and there's no doubt that they care for each other. That's enough. (It's enough to make him a little jealous, too. He hasn't ever had a friend who was so close that they didn't need to speak to communicate.]

Nyota Uhura is a lieutenant on the Enterprise and she's the best xenolinguist I have ever met. I knew of her at the academy, but we spoke rarely until coming here.

[mortemscintilla]

[ Pavel probably doesn't understand -- or perhaps he does? -- the close bonds that can form between people who spend each day and night on the battlefield, who fight and bleed and kill together. In Hei's and Pai's case, that closeness pre-existed the war. What resulted was an almost uncanny synchronization, a wordless communication almost akin to telepathy. ]

[ (That didn't, however, mean that the sibling shared everything. Even with their matter-of-fact intimacy, there were secrets between them. Like, for example, Pai's knowledge of the Syndicate's plans, and her own designs against them. Designs she -- and Amber -- hid from Hei right until the end.) ]

[ He doesn't want to think about it. Not at this moment, anyway. But by degrees, he finds himself leaning into Pai. Out of unconscious protectiveness, or remembered loneliness, even he can't say. ]

[ To Pavel, almost dryly, ] At least with her around, you have someone to speak Russian with.

[sleepingstar]

What about Spock? [Pai is interested to meet a Vulcan.]

[candothat]

[He doesn't know about those bonds yet, although the main bridge crew did feel a sense of closeness after the Nero ordeal. Nothing like a sibling bond, or the bond between soldiers trapped in an ongoing war.]

Terran languages are not her specialty. Her Russian is good, but I think she likes it less than more exotic languages.

Spock? Commander Spock is frightening.